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Home » Prospective Students » The Community at Luther Seminary » Blogs » Student Travel Blogs | ||||||||||
Pine Ridge Indian ReservationAs a second year (Middler) student in the master of divinity (M.Div.) program at Luther Seminary, Linda Webster spent six weeks on the Pine Ridge Indian Reservation as part of Luther's Cross-Cultural program. She kept this web log to share her experiences. Linda received a scholarship for her studies at Pine Ridge through a grant from the Otto Bremer Foundation that was awarded to Luther Seminary for the Justice and Christian Community Program Fund.Blog Entries Sunday - September 7, 2003 An Introduction Monday - September 8, 2003 Preparing for the Pine Ridge Experience The Journey Begins Tuesday - September 9, 2003 Week 1 (9/8 9/14) Part 1 Friday - September 12, 2003 Week 1 (9/8 9/14) Part 2 Saturday - September 13, 2003 End of Week 1 (9/8 9/14) Sunday - September 14, 2003 Week 2 (9/14 9/20) Part 1 Monday - September 15, 2003 Week 2 (9/14 9/20) Part 2 Tuesday - September 16, 2003 Week 2 (9/14 9/20) Part 3 Sunday - September 21, 2003 Week 3 (9/21 9/27) Part 1 Week 3 (9/21 9/27) Part 2 Monday - September 22, 2003 Week 3 (9/21 9/27) Part 3 Tuesday - September 23, 2003 Week 3 (9/21 9/27) Part 4 Sunday - September 28, 2003 Week 4 (9/28 10/4) Part 1 Monday - September 29, 2003 Week 4 (9/28 10/4) Part 2 Saturday - October 4, 2003 Week 4 (9/28 10/4) Part 3 Sunday - October 5, 2003 Week 5 (10/5 10/11) Part 1 Thursday - October 9, 2003 Week 5 (10/5 10/11) Part 2 Friday - October 10, 2003 Week 5 (10/5 10/11) Part 3 Sunday - October 12, 2003 Week 6 (10/12 10/15) Part 1 Monday - October 13, 2003 Week 6 (10/12 10/15) Part 2 Tuesday - October 14, 2003 Week 6 (10/12 10/15) Part 3 Wednesday - October 15, 2003 Week 6 (10/15) Part 4 The Student Blog area of the Luther Seminary Web site contains personal Web logs (online journal entries) of Luther Seminary students. The information and opinions therein reflect individual thoughts, tastes and activities. They do not reflect official policies or positions of Luther Seminary. Sunday - September 7, 2003 - top An Introduction Hi, my name is Linda Webster. I am a 2nd-year student (a Middler) in the Master of Divinity (M.Div.) program at Luther Seminary. Can you tell I am introducing you to a new language called "seminary-ese"? I'll tell you part of my story so you understand why I am writing this diary. In the summer of 2002, I visited Luther Seminary. I knew I would be attending there starting Fall 2002, but I wanted to get a feel for the campus, where I would be living, look at an apartment to see, really, how much stuff I wanted to bring with me in my move from Washington State, and just get to know the surroundings a little. The coordinator for my visit, Kendie Mohn, and my student tour guide, Leland Armbright, were wonderful. (They are both on internship this year – which means they are "apprentice" pastors in Washington State and Arizona, respectively.) Both of them went out of their way to make sure I was being taken care of, doing the things I wanted to do, and seeing the people I asked to speak with. One person, in particular, I wanted to speak with was Rod Maeker in Cross-Cultural studies. Having looked at the Luther catalog, I understood that each M.Div. student is required to have at least one cross-cultural experience. I was particularly interested in talking with him about the experience offered at the Pine Ridge Indian Reservation in South Dakota. I have long had an interest in working within the Native American population, but had not yet figured out how to do this. During our conversation, Rod saw the depth of my interest and told me about a possible extended cross-cultural experience that was available through Luther Seminary. Instead of the three-week, January term (J-term) experience, this would be a semester-long, meaning 13 weeks, experience. But, the problem was he had yet to find any students interested in going. It would mean living on the Reservation at the Pine Ridge Retreat Center and taking classes online. Well, I spoke up and said this was something I would really like to do. Rod's response was to say, "If you want to go, you find the people to go with you, because we don't want just one person to go. There have to be a least three of you." To make a long story short, it took me about eight months to find two other female students willing to go. (They had to be female because we were to room together at the Retreat Center.) By the end of May 2003, Rena Peterson and Comfort Osei, along with me, were committed to go to Pine Ridge, not for 13 weeks, but for six during the fall 2003 semester. With all of the details worked out to the best of our ability, on September 7th we set off for Pine Ridge in my recently purchased, and recently repaired, used car. My getting this used 1991 Ford Thunderbird from Toshi Uemura, an international student at Luther from Japan, also has quite a wonderful story behind it, but that is for another time. As you can imagine, I have been excited about going to Pine Ridge for almost a year. But, as the time to leave came closer, I have to admit that I wasn't really sure what to expect out of this experience. So, for weeks before I left St. Paul I realized that I needed to open myself up more to what God would do, than to what I could plan or would know expect. So, this is where I started from on this journey. I hope you will come with me and, through this journey, experience six weeks on the Pine Ridge Indian Reservation. I am sure we will see and experience many new, and most likely, many different things. Until later, your sister in Christ – Linda Monday - September 8, 2003 - top Preparing for the Pine Ridge Experience Hello, again! Now that you know I am excited about the experience at Pine Ridge, I'd like to tell you a little about how I chose to prepare to work within a culture different from my own. Not all students at Luther Seminary do this, but it is something I would highly recommend for all people. I have done some reading on the history of white/Native American relations and, through a class this past year at Luther Seminary, have studied some about racism. I am sorry to say that neither issue presents white people in a very position light. Now, understand I have German and English heritage, so this really hits home to me. But, I also feel it is important to be realistic. If you are interested in reading some books, I would suggest Missionary Conquest by George Tinker and Dismantling Racism by Brandt. Both are eye opening. As I prepared to come to Pine Ridge, I began to realize that I really did not know what to expect once I got here. After coming to grips with a small part of Indian/white history, I could understand that there would be no welcome with outstretched arms, banners and a brass band. Okay, maybe that's even too cynical for me, but I hope you understand what I'm saying. Coming to Pine Ridge as a white person (which is the only way I can come), is bringing a constant, painful presence into their midst. Whether you are accepted or not is not up to you. That is a hard pill for a white person to swallow. As a whole we feel if we work harder, try harder, we will succeed, we will be accepted. This is not true when you are not the "controlling" culture. Realizing these things may just be the beginning of humility for me, but still I realize I may, and probably will, constantly live out a white heritage that can be very offensive to people of other cultures. These are some of the thoughts I faced as I considered coming to Pine Ridge. Lord, be my Way, my Truth, and my Light in the experience! Your sister in Christ, Linda Monday - September 8, 2003 - top The Journey Begins The peace of the Lord be with you! As I prepare to start this journey to Pine Ridge, my prayer is that I will be open-minded, openhearted, and, oh I can hope, close-mouthed. Open-minded and openhearted I think I'm okay at, closed-mouthed is another thing! For the first week, the three of us, Comfort, Rena, and I, cannot stay at the Retreat Center. There is a gathering of many of the Native American leaders, ordained and lay, from within the ELCA holding a training session here, but we have been invited to attend! What a great experience this will be. The downside is that we will be staying at a motel for this first week. So, as I leave the parking lot in Burntvedt with the car packed to the hilt, I am mentally preparing for an all-day trip. And, as most women will, the three of us start talking about all sorts of things. Even though we have known each other from various classes, we are really just getting to know each other as roommates. Now, we find we have many similar likes and dislikes. (Maybe trying to eat together won't be so bad, but we'll find out!) Comfort is originally from Ghana, but has spent many years in the U.S. and is an M.A. student in Islamic Studies. Rena has lived mostly in the upper Midwest and is an M.Div. like me. And, me, I've lived in the Northwest, the Northeast, and in the central Midwest. We are all so different. In a sense, we are our own cross-cultural experience. Have you ever been to the Badlands in South Dakota? The geology is fascinating. There is a beauty here that is different from any other place on Earth. Once we leave the freeway and head south towards Nebraska, the landscape is even more spectacular. It looks like it has been carved up by some random woodcutter making an Escher print. Some wild turkeys provide momentary entertainment by meandering across the road in front of the car. We slow down just long enough to get a good look at the last few before they disappear into the roadside brush and confirm, yes indeed, they are turkeys! After 12-1/2 hours we make it to the motel where we are staying in Rushville, Nebraska. This is about 23 miles south of the Pine Ridge Retreat Center, , but also a 36-inch color T.V. The walls in the living room match the era of the carpeting—dark paneling. We'll survive this for one week! This cross-cultural experience has actually started! Thanks be to God! Tuesday - September 9, 2003 - top Week 1 (9/8 9/14) Part 1
Rena, Comfort (fellow students) and I have spent our first night at the motel in Rushville, Neb. It's about 24 miles south of the town of Pine Ridge, which is just over the South Dakota-Nebraska border. I was given directions, via e-mail by Larry Peterson, the director of the Pine Ridge Retreat Center. They seemed simple enough! This entire week there are Native American leaders from many parts of the ELCA at the Pine Ridge Retreat Center. Rod Maeker, director of Cross-Cultural Studies at Luther, has assured us that we are welcome to join in on all the activities of this group for the entire week. As we drive up to the Retreat Center, I have to admit it is not what I was expecting. It is on a "main drag and, good grief, it's across from a Taco John's. My thoughts are bouncing around – how do you "retreat" at a place like this? It looks like just any old house. Shouldn't it have some sort of special look about it? Okay, God – so it's different than I imagined in my somewhat limited (I refuse to use the words narrow-minded) point-of-view! I'll deal with it. Here we are walking into a new group of people. I have met Larry before, where Comfort and Rena have not. None of us have met Marilyn Sorenson who is from the Churchwide Office in Chicago and has a very long title: Director, American Indian and Alaska Native Ministries and Racial Justice Commission for Multicultural Ministries. As I find out, she is a formidable and wonderful person. We also meet Ramona from Portland, Ore., Wilma and Sherrie from Cherokee, N.C., Melinda and Steve from Bowler, Wis., Larry T. from Detroit Lakes, N.D. (along with his daughter, her friend, and his young son Warren), David from Ohio State University (whom I met last spring as he was the spiritual director for Quiet Day), and Marlene from Minneapolis, Minn. Some are pastors. Some are not. The Indian nations represented include Sioux - Oglala Lakota, Sisseton, Hunkpapa bands, Cherokee, Klamath, and Mohican. As breakfast begins this first day, Larry lets us know that there is actually a regular schedule of events that occurs at the Retreat Center every day. First, between 11 a.m. and 1 p.m. sandwiches are given out to anyone who comes to the door and asks for one. Second, every weekday between 3:30 p.m. and 5 p.m. and on weekend days between 2:30 and 4 p.m., all children who come to the door are welcome to come and play in the lower level under Larry's constant supervision. There are board games, bumper pool, foosball, ping-pong, and other games. Larry commits himself whole-heartedly to these things. For the next six weeks that we will be here, Larry is asking us to do the same. I am impressed by the dedication I see in Larry and the love he has for the people he is serving through the Retreat Center. I especially see the love and care he has for the children. As Larry explains the daily schedule to us all, he says it's okay if we miss part of the sandwich-distributing time, but he emphasizes to us that the 1-1/2 hours between 3:30 to 5p.m. or 2:30 to 4 p.m. is dedicated to the kids. No exceptions. The phone is not answered during that time. The door is only opened to children. All other business is put aside for the sake of the children! And, a snack is prepared for them every day. I came here to see how to work among the people. I think Larry Peterson is one living example I could wish to emulate. Thank you, God, for bringing me here. More later – your sister in Christ, Linda Friday - September 12, 2003 - top Week 1 (9/8 9/14) Part 2
This week has started with many introductions and learning histories of people. It is interesting as the week progresses through some of the training sessions, the meals, the speakers who visit, and just the "sitting around time" to hear of and learn about the differences and similarities between tribes. Many social customs are very similar. One of the speakers, Rev. Dr. Martin Broken Leg, is an Episcopal priest and a professor at Augustana College in Sioux Falls, S.D. He has accepted a new position at a seminary in Vancouver, B.C., which will start next year. As Martin spoke about Indian culture and language and youth, Marilyn made a connection to something that she had forgotten about in her past. She had forgotten how she learned about family and social relationships. This custom of teaching children in this "oral" culture impressed me. Whenever you would go to the general store many of the elders (those of the generation of your parent's parents and older) would be sitting and talking. One of your parents would go down the line and greet each person and you would follow. There is a word that describes each relationship, which side of the family they are related to, and how you are related. Your parent would greet them in this manner, and, as a child, you would have to "translate" this relationship down another generation. (One book I read, called Waterlily by Ella Deloira, weaves this into the story.) If you got the relationship correct the elder would give you a dime! It was great fun to listen to "notes" being compared by Martin and Marilyn and Ramona, and have them realize they were all schooled in this same way. This week is growing into a wonderful learning experience, with every moment filled up in some way. God is working and moving here! More later – your sister in Christ, Linda Saturday - September 13, 2003 - top End of Week 1 (9/8 9/14) This week has been one of many challenges, for me and for others here. Life at the Retreat Center takes some getting used to. It starts at 7 a.m. with the first knock comes at the door. It's Gabby for his daily coffee, toast and morning devotional with Larry. Gabby is an older Indian man, a recovering alcoholic, who became a Christian over 10 years ago. He acknowledges continually that he is probably only alive today because he became sober the day he became a Christian. There is knocking at the door—particularly between 11 a.m. to 1 p.m.—when sandwiches are given to anyone who asks. Some who come are the local "street people." During the warmer months, many of them sleep in the grassy ditch between the Retreat Center and the Catholic church next door. Often they are alcoholics. But, there are others who come who just need food. Many times there are kids involved. After lunch the kids start to come. They want to play after school, but they don't get to come in until 3:30 p.m. That doesn't stop them from knocking! That starts as early as 2 p.m. some days! As Larry is often out working at the Habitat for Humanity house that is being built near Porcupine, we, the three seminarians, have taken on answering the door. This, hopefully, is helping with the meetings going on this week. We have been having worship every night. Learning to sing hymns in Lakota has been interesting. This group of pastors and lay ministers meeting here this week is a talented bunch. Thursday night after worship we ended up having a hymn sing from With One Voice. Marlene plays a "mean" keyboard. And, me, I always enjoy singing up a storm! As this group prepares to depart, Comfort, Rena and I prepare to move into the Retreat Center. Our first week has ended! Now, we get to help with all the laundry. All the sheets and towels need to be washed in order to get ready for the next group coming in! There is, truly, never a dull moment, much less a quiet one, at the Pine Ridge Retreat Center. God's peace and blessing on your day – please, keep the needy in your prayers today. Your sister, Linda Sunday - September 14, 2003 - top Week 2 (9/14 9/20) Part 1 Greetings from Pine Ridge! We are moved in and getting used to the daily happenings around here even more. We've gotten our food situated in the fridge, figured out what has been "left behind" by the previous group, started consolidating things in the fridge(that's scary in and of itself!), and what have you. The kitchen is getting organized to our liking for our stay —five more weeks. It seems too short a time already! The next group, some nurses doing graduate work at the Mayo Clinic, is due at any moment. They are going to be involved in various aspects of public health nursing here on the reservation and talking with members of the community throughout the week. One of the great things that Rena, Comfort and I get to experience is that if there is someone coming to talk to a group here at the Retreat Center, we are generally invited, too. I think one of the really hard things for me to hear as someone who wants to do ministry on the Reservation is of the struggles that many traditional Indians are having between Native spirituality and Christianity. As a white person, who wants to think that the United States was founded on principles of religious freedom, it is a difficult pill to swallow to realize that practice of Native American spirituality was outlawed until as recently as 1993! We, who in our classes at seminary talk about Christ coming into culture, are part of the (white) culture that has prohibited that same religious freedom to the indigenous people of North America. My heart hurts over this. The question I ask myself is, "Can I now become part of the solution, instead of continuing to be part of the problem?" My prayer is, "Come, Holy Spirit, come. Mold me, melt me, fill me, use me!" May we all have a similar prayer. Your sister in Christ, Linda Monday - September 15, 2003 - top Week 2 (9/14 9/20) Part 2 The nurses from Mayo Clinic arrived and started with their own flurry of activity. They come back every day with different experiences they talk about as they are going around Pine Ridge with the nurses from the Public Health Nursing unit of the Indian Health Service. Every evening they go out to meet with someone from the community or have someone come to the Retreat Center. When someone comes to the Retreat Center we get to become part of the group, too. One speaker, Will Peters, teaches Lakota culture and language at Wolf Creek School. Besides this, Will and his wife Lena make wonderful jewelry. I now own several of their necklaces! Within the first two weeks, Will has come over several times. He is a Christian and practices some of the traditional Lakota ways. This particular night, I ask him to share about the Sun Dance. As the Indian ways of worship of Creator have been put down or prohibited by white people for so long, I see, and begin to understand, the ambivalence I sense in many Christian Indians. For many younger Indians today, it seems, they are searching to find roots and meaning within a culture where traditional ways have almost been eradicated by the dominant white culture. I continue to try to draw parallels within my own cultural understanding in order to understand the great sense of loss many Indian people feel when they talk about ways and traditions that have been lost – hopefully not forever. This is the way I am starting to think about this. Try to think about cultural traditions you and your extended family have, e.g. the way you celebrate Christmas or the celebration of Chinese New Year or making and eating lefse or whatever! How would any of us feel if these things were prohibited to us? If after 100 years, you were told you could make lefse again, would there still be anyone around who remembers how to make it? Maybe, maybe not. For me, this is worth thinking about, especially being in a culture that is different from what I have always known and makes me, sometimes, a little uncomfortable because what I know (white culture) and who I am (a white person) are definitely in the minority! All of this is making me more aware of the need of God's enlightenment in my life and not just my own understanding of things. God's peace to you. Your sister in Christ, Linda Tuesday - September 16, 2003 - top Week 2 (9/14 9/20) Part 3
The nurses from Rochester continue to invite very interesting people to come and talk with them (and us!). Tonight Dar Walks Out is coming. She is the president of the Woihanble Yuwita - Habitat for Humanity on the Pine Ridge Reservation. A commitment has been made by Habitat to build one house in each of the nine districts. Currently, we are helping to work on the house being built in Porcupine. (If you are interested in finding out more about H4H on Pine Ridge, their website is www.orgsites.com/sd/pine-ridge-hfh or, even more importantly, if you are interested in contributing to H4H here at Pine Ridge contact Dar at greyfeather4@hotmail.com.)
Dar has been learning some of the traditional healing ways from relatives, but I was interested to hear she is not adverse to reading other books on medicinal plants and herbs that are written by non-Native people. This is a great learning experience from me in many ways – and these experiences just keep coming!
I'm wondering how much I can absorb in six weeks time! How changed will I be when I come away from this experience? Lord, work in me – and Rena – and Comfort. Please, keep us and all people on the reservations in the United States in your prayers. God's peace and hope to you. Linda Sunday - September 21, 2003 - top Week 3 (9/21 9/27) Part 1
I'd like to introduce you to a young man that is staying at the Retreat Center full-time. His name is Peter Hill and he is a teacher at Red Cloud School, which is run by the Jesuit order of the Catholic church. Peter is a white, Anglo-Saxon, Episcopalian who was born in Philadelphia, Pa. in 1977. He attended Carleton College in Northfield, Minn. between 1996 and 2000. What is unique about Peter is how he got here to Pine Ridge. For those of us who think about what influences church youth groups may have on a person, I'd like to tell you Peter's story as he related it to me. I have written all of this in order to encourage all of us who will be influencing the directions that young people's lives may take because of experiences they have in their church youth groups. Peter was involved in the youth group at St. Martin-in-the-Fields Episcopal church in Philadelphia, Pa. In the summer of 1992, the youth leaders, Barbara and Jack, took a group of young people to the "500 Years of Survival" event at the National Cathedral in Washington, DC. Many Native American leaders were there. Peter was on this trip and remembers meeting many people, but he particularly mentioned a woman named Zona Fills-the-Pipe, who was a matriarch on the Pine Ridge Reservation. I could tell he was very impressed by her. Following this the youth group came on 10-day servant trips to Pine Ridge that Peter participated in the summers of his 9th, 10th, and 12th grade years in high school and his freshman year in college. He said that the first two years he came he was enthralled by the beauty and the differences he saw. Peter is quite a reader and mentioned that before he came he read the book Dakota Woman by Mary Crow Dog and was impressed by the fascinating, yet terrible, influence of the boarding schools on people's lives. He also said he started learning about A.I.M. (American Indian Movement) during that time. Peter continued by saying that his interest in Native American issues just kept growing and as preparation for the 1996 and 1997 trips he read numerous books that give a wide spectrum of information and ideas. The list he gave me, which he recommends to everyone, is: In the Spirit of Crazy Horse by Matthiessen, Custer Died for your Sins by Vine Deloira, Bury my Heart at Wounded Knee by Dee Brown, Century of Dishonor by Helen Hunt Jackson, and Killing the White Man's Indian by Fergus M. Bordewich. While attending Carleton College, Peter continued to learn about general social justice/injustice issues, immigration issues, welfare reform, and met with the few Indian students that were on campus. He kept in touch with Native American issues and what was happening on Pine Ridge through the newspaper Indian Country Today (which can now be found on the Internet at www.indiancountry.com). Peter got his degree in American Studies, combining History - Sociology/Anthropology and Native American Studies. The senior paper he wrote is entitled "Uranium Mining and Toxic Waste Storage on Reservations." He then decided to become licensed as a teacher and took the necessary courses for that and finished in February 2001. Through a program called "International Partnership for Service Learning," Peter was placed in the Wolakota Program, an after school program for K through 12, at the Little Wound School in Kyle, SD on the Pine Ridge Reservation. (Wolakota means "the good things about being Lakota".) It was after this, that Peter took a job teaching at Red Cloud School. I have seen how the people of this community respect this young man. Peter is well accepted and thought highly by many of the Indian people because he has chosen to live in the community and be involved in life on the reservation. He is even learning the Lakota language! God's peace and hope to you all. Your sister in Christ, Linda Sunday - September 21, 2003 - top Week 3 (9/21 9/27) Part 2 Greetings! Can you believe it? Larry is leaving for a week-long workshop and training in church planting in Colorado and leaving us (Comfort, Rena and me) to oversee the Retreat Center. This is a very trusting man! All kidding aside, Larry Peterson is a very special person. He has been a Lutheran pastor for about 25 years and, I believe, has a vision for the future of the Lutheran church. He is dedicated and committed to Native American ministries, but also has a heart for intentionally multi-cultural ministries throughout the Lutheran church, especially in the South Dakota synod where he is serving. I find him to be a constant source of inspiration because he lives and speaks what he believes. I hope we all at Luther Seminary find such mentors in our lives. I look forward to hearing what he will share when he gets back here. Well, as Larry takes off and the nurses from the Augustana College program at Mayo Clinic wrap up their stay, we are getting the bathrooms cleaned, sheets and towels laundered, and the beds remade so that they are ready for the next group of people who will be arriving soon. The level of activity at the Retreat Center is sometimes unbelievable. I continue to marvel at Larry's energy level being able to do all of this on his own most of the time! Pastoral care is taking on a whole new dimension for me: talking with people, handing out sandwiches to any and all who come to the door asking (we do try to restrict the hours to 11 a.m. to 1 p.m.), talking and playing with the kids who visit daily(between 3:30 and 5 p.m. Monday through Friday, and 2:30-4 p.m. Saturday and Sunday), working on the Habitat house, plus working on all the various and sundry other projects that are on-going! The idea of a pastor (and a Christian) being the servant of all is truly taking on new dimensions for me as I write! I think I can say that in the midst of all the work, Rena, Comfort and I are having a good time! We have rearranged the kitchen to our liking. We are cleaning out the communal refrigerator from all those things groups of people before us have left behind. And, we have even found our way to the nearest Walmart, which is in Chadron (pronounced shad-run), about 40 to 50 miles northeast of here. Peter (the other long-term resident) gave me directions going by the back country roads. What a great drive Rena and I had-exploring the countryside between Pine Ridge and Chadron. That's all for now. God's peace and hope to you all. Your sister, Linda Monday - September 22, 2003 - top Week 3 (9/21 9/27) Part 3 The trip to Walmart ended up with a tour of Chadron State College, as our directions were not quite complete and we wandered around a bit! As we drove up to the Walmart I realized it was a Super Walmart —Yahoo! But, in all of my excitement (can you believe it?) I am beginning to realize more and more the things that are not present on the Pine Ridge Reservation—anywhere. There is no bank. There is no movie theater. There are a couple of fast food-type places, but so many things that we often take for granted in our daily lives in white culture, are missing here on the reservation. One of the biggest and most important things that I have found hidden, if not missing, is the presence of hope. This week I start tutoring math and science at Pine Ridge High School. I have already sat through a teachers' meeting about state guidelines in education and the fact that the kids are not meeting them. I have talked with three of the four math teachers. It is disheartening for them that some of the kids don't even show up for school until the fifth or sixth week of the semester, while others may drop out completely, or just quit for a while and then return. And, truthfully, if they see no hope for their future, why would getting an education matter? These kids live lives full of despair and hopelessness. Is their only future drug or alcohol addiction and unemployment? I believe that is what many see. "Without a vision the people perish." God, grant a vision of your love and care to all people here on the reservation. Help us all to be instruments of your love, your peace, and your justice in the world. May we all be true servants of one another. Your sister, Linda Tuesday - September 23, 2003 - top Week 3 (9/21 9/27) Part 4
Greetings! There are so many different people who come to the door selling their crafts or drawings. There are dream catchers, necklaces, earrings, pen & ink and some pastel drawings – so many different things. This is the way many people make their living here on the reservation. I wish I could help each and every person, I don't have that kind of means—but I can help some by purchasing a few things. Well, one of the women, Lee, who makes very interesting dream catchers, had a baby. She called the Retreat Center to let Larry know, as she is a frequent visitor here. The baby was born by C-section. Since Larry is still gone, Comfort, Rena and I are going up to the hospital to see her. What a wonderful little bundle this unnamed girl baby is! In the midst of hardship here on the reservation there is joy! Our next guests are arriving. They are from St. Luke's Presbyterian Church in Minneapolis. Many of the women coming know Marlene Helgemo who is a Luther grad and currently the pastor at All Nations' Church in Minneapolis, which is a UCC congregation. This group has been coming out to the reservation for years and is now know at the "sewing ladies." Every year they bring out a trailer loaded with sewing machines and material to sew. At first they taught sewing, but now it seems they mostly are guides rather than instructors. They go out to Manderson (another town and district of the reservation) and set up in a church or community building. It is mostly by word-of-mouth, but women just show up and sew whatever they want, as long as the supply of material holds out! The "sewing ladies" are only here for a few days. The first major crisis we experienced at the Retreat Center was during their time here. One of the ladies locked the only set of keys to their bunkroom inside. As they took off for dinner, Rena and I were left to puzzle how to solve this dilemma. We tried several different things, but finally I just took off the door molding and then I could work the lock and get the door open. I'm sure I had those ladies convinced I could do almost anything— what a nice feeling! During this time, Rena's husband, David, has come to stay for a couple of days. Of course, we are putting him to work on Cecil and Charlotte Weston's house in Porcupine that we are working at priming and painting. I must say that I am continually learning new things. I have learned how to reglaze windows. Somehow I missed learning that along the way, but now I know how! It's just one more thing I can add on to my pastoral resume. Yes, indeed, I do windows—reglazing that is! God's peace to you! Linda P.S. The baby's name is now Lucy. Sunday - September 28, 2003 - top Week 4 (9/28 10/4) Part 1 Wow! Things move slowly, but yet more quickly here. The "sewing ladies" have left and a new group of people from Trinity Lutheran in Owatonna, MN is due. It seems one group just leaves, there is time for cleaning and laundry and the next group is at the door. What a wonderful thing to have this place where people can come and have a base from which to work, have people from the community come in to talk with them, and a have place to rest. The work on the Weston's house is progressing, but slowly because we feel it is really important that we are at the Retreat Center to give out sandwiches for our daily visitors. We are traveling a lot, but it seems necessary in order to "fit" all these things into our day. Since I am tutoring at the high school, and not there when the younger kids come after school, I have committed to have the snacks ready for the kids before I go everyday. I am having fun searching out things to put together or create in order that the kids have something semi-nutritious as well as good tasting. I must see, though, that the cream cheese-filled celery was not a big hit! Larry is due back anytime and I have put a "Welcome Home!" sign on his door. He has been greatly missed by one and all. So many people come to the door and want to talk with him, even if it is just for a moment or two. We have some reading assignments to complete for him that we are going to sit down and discuss when he gets back. The first books we are reading and discussing is Waterlily. Life is a continual cycle here. Almost from the first moment here on the reservation, we started hearing about deaths in families often due car accidents, which often involve drunk drivers, and suicide. I'm coming to believe no one really dies of old age at Pine Ridge. That is a very scary thought. All Native Americans are not alcoholics, but there is a tremendous metabolic predisposition to have a problem with alcohol among this population, which is not alleviated in anyway with the way the dominant white culture has chosen to help or hinder this problem. It behooves those of us who are becoming more aware of this problem to sit up and take notice of the situation with alcohol sales near or at the boundaries of this reservation and every reservation in the United States. The town of Pine Ridge on the reservation is a perfect example of this on-going problem. Driving south from Pine Ridge into Nebraska, which is about 2 miles, there is a little, unincorporated town called White Clay. It consists mainly of ramshackle buildings. In these buildings are two or three liquor stores, a restaurant, a gas station, and a car junkyard/auto parts business. (I could have missed one or two things – maybe.) I have given this some thought in trying to draw an analogy that we, as white people, would understand about what having these liquor stores within walking distance to the largest population center on this reservation. I would liken this to having a legalized cocaine or crack dealer sitting within walking distance of the school where your children attend, or within walking distance of the city hall in your city or town that you come from. These are things in white society that we would never put up with, if at all possible. I have been going over this situation in my mind and have asked myself this question, "Just because something is legally allowed is it morally justified?" I will leave you with this question and, hopefully, you will ponder it with me. I pray that God will give you and me clear vision in all that we do to live into God's purpose on Earth. Your sister in Christ, Linda Monday - September 29, 2003 - top Week 4 (9/28 10/4) Part 2 It's great to have help! The Owatonna group has helped us move the work on the Weston's house along tremendously! More paint brushes and scrapers have been purchased. The priming is almost done and the painting is on its way. There is one part of the fascia that just cannot be reached with the ladders we have. We have to wait until Larry is back and he can get one of the extension ladders from the Habitat house. When we got back from the Weston's today, Larry was home. He had a wonderful time and has so much to share with all of us. Becoming intentionally multi-cultural is a great challenge for the Lutheran church, and many churches, today. I know, for me, it is continually having my vision of the Church renewed and refreshed so that I don't start to get tunnel vision and only see the chapel-on-campus or church-on-the-street-corner where I worship. My prayer is that God would help me walk the way the Spirit is leading in everything, but particularly in this. I see as I become more involved in this community that people are becoming more accepting of seeing this white woman (me!) walking around. It is there in the nod of the head, in the hand shake, in the meeting of the eyes. I am thankful for this! Thank you, God! Even before I came to seminary, I have felt called to work in the Indian community. I knew about LAMP (Lutheran Association of Ministers and Pilots), which is mainly in Alaska and Canada. But my thought was "God, Lutherans aren't doing work among the Native American people on the reservations." My question then was, "God, are you sure you know what you are calling me into – ministry as a Lutheran pastor and ministry among the Native Americans?" When I found out about this program at Luther Seminary, and that I could spend an entire term (which turned into six weeks instead) at Pine Ridge, I was so excited! I have thought about coming here for over a year. This has been my heart's desire to here. I just have to tell you this – I have not been disappointed! I truly feel that this is where I belong. Already, I can tell it will be hard to leave! Please keep this ministry in your prayers. God's peace and hope to you all. Your sister, Linda Saturday - October 4, 2003 - top Week 4 (9/28 10/4) Part 3 Greetings! I forgot to tell you about something that happened while Larry was gone that made me so happy. It is one of those joys of daily ministry! Even before Larry left, I started joining him and Gabby in the morning for their breakfast/devotional and prayer time. When Larry left I told Gabby he was more than welcome to continue to come in the morning. The first morning Gabby did not come, but he came by later in the day. I just mentioned to him that I missed seeing him. The next morning and every morning after that he came! This little bit of fellowship, encouragement and trust from my brother Gabby has given me a gift that far exceeds many I have received in the past. Thank you, God, for your goodness to me! Now that Larry is back I am continuing in this fellowship time with them in the morning. "How good and how pleasant it is for brethren to dwell together in unity!" I have to remember this, as Comfort, Rena and I are living out of the same room. This is a time of learning more about living in community, even between the three of us. We each have different sleep patterns. (Comfort is early to bed; Rena is definitely a late, late night person. Me, I vary a lot.) We have found we eat differently, too, which is not really a surprise. So, some things we do together and some we do not. There is constant adjust and learned sensitivity to each others' ways. We are inviting Peter and Larry to join us often in meals. We have some others who join us sometimes, like Erna, who is the person I am working with at tutoring in the high school. This week we had two guests for dinner, Gene and Agnes Tyon. Gene is the brother of Father Ben Tyon, and an Episcopal priest. Agnes is also an ordained Episcopal priest, the first Lakota woman ordained in the United States. I have to adjust to calling her Father Agnes! Larry has encouraged us, as part of the Indian culture, to sit and listen and not ask questions unless they are invited. (If you know me well, you can understand how hard this might be for me! I am always asking questions--I am innately curious and questioning!) After dinner Gene and Agnes started talking about some of the Native American religious practices, and confessed that they are part of the generation that has lost so much of their heritage. As I mentioned before, among the Indian Christians there is quite a dichotomy of thought about Native religion and how these two things fit, or don't fit, together in their lives. Agnes is the pipe-carrier for her family, which in the Indian culture is a great honor. Larry had mentioned this to us previously, but Gene brought it up again. Gene then asked us what we thought of Native American religion. Being invited to speak, I responded that I believe it is truly evident that the Native American people know God and that Christ comes into culture bringing the Word of the gospel. A little later I did ask Gene what he thought of Native American religion and practices. Both Agnes and Gene acknowledged that there is so much that has been lost and that the pipe signifies power in Indian religion, but that they both do not understand the extent of it. Before Gene and Agnes left they brought out a drawing and dance regalia to show us. This drawing is done on a piece of muslin that is a story in pictures. It shows the meeting of an Indian chief with white soldiers and a clash between them. It appears to end in tragedy for the Indian chief, but the entire significance of the encounter is something none of us were clear on. The dance regalia was absolutely beautiful. Gene had this made especially for Agnes to wear at pow-wows. The top is a hide that is completely covered with a beaded design. I saw this as a wonderful expression of love between Gene and Agnes, which I confided in a whisper to her. She just smiled at me! Awe to have such love showered on one another! This was a wonderful evening. God's peace to you. Pray for God's hope in Chr Sunday - October 5, 2003 - top Week 5 (10/5 10/11) Part 1 I am preaching in church today! There are no Lutheran churches on the reservation, just the shared Lutheran-Presbyterian ministry at the Retreat Center. So, there were several options for my preaching "occasion" here, either at Holy Cross Episcopal church in Pine Ridge or Makasan Presbyterian church in Oglala. We have attended both, so both would have worked. I will be preaching at Makasan (the "n" is not pronounced). The pastor, Asa, said he would be very happy to have the day off! So, today is World Communion Day. In preparing my sermon I have considered this along with the texts from the lectionary. As we were traveling up to the Westons' house to paint this last week, I made Rena read the lectionary texts to me, along with some others I was thinking about, as we were driving. About Saturday, or so, I realized that I didn't have my hand-held tape recorder with me. There is a small Radio Shack located in the same building as the Sioux Nation grocery store, which is just across the street. Well, I got busy and forgot to go over there. So, around 9:30 p.m., I asked Rena if she wanted to ride with me to the Walmart in Chadron. (Yes, Walmart, which is about an hour's drive each way!). Now, I had thought we had read on the Internet that this Super Walmart was open 24 hours. Guess what? We got there and they had closed at 10 p.m. Am I ready to panic? Not yet! I got up early today, put the final touches on my sermon, got myself together, and took off for Chadron while most everyone was still asleep. (I did check out my options before I left by asking Larry if he had a recorder I could use, but he was unsure that it worked and I was just paranoid enough at that point to want to have something I could rely on.) Everything went really well. I got to Chadron, got the recorder, tapes and batteries, remembered to get some keys copied that Peter asked me to do, and took off to go back to Pine Ridge via the very beautiful drive on the back roads. All went well until I came off the back road, got onto the main highway, drove through White Clay, crossed the reservation/state line, and promptly noticed that the sound I was sure I was hearing meant I had a flat tire! I got out of the car and, sure enough, my driver's side back tire was kaput! Now, I have been having some trouble getting the trunk of my car open lately. So, there I am struggling with my key in the lock and thinking, "Boy, this is great! I'm going to be late to preach." Just as I'm thinking this the trunk pops open and a car with two older Indian men goes by me. They go a little farther, turn around, and come back to help. They took one look at my jack (which, by the way, is all rusty – what can I say, I just bought this used car in May and hadn't had an occasion to check out the tire jack!) and gave me a look that said "that will never do!" and got one out of their car. They saw my Minnesota license plates and asked what I was doing here. I told them about the Retreat Center and my preaching in Oglala that morning as they very handily and graciously changed my tire. After the flat tire was stored in my truck, I shook hands with them, and they were off. As I drove behind them into Pine Ridge, I laughed for joy at God's gracious provision for me through two Indian angels who stopped to help me! Thank you, God! Your sister, Linda And, yes, I think the sermon went well from all that I have heard. Thursday - October 9, 2003 - top Week 5 (10/5 10/11) Part 2 Hallelujah! We have finally progressed to the point of completing the painting of the Westons' house. One day Rena and Comfort and I were out there and I used the extension ladder Larry had brought from the Habitat house to reach the fascia on the upper eaves. I was really leery about trying to get the ladder set up between a tree and some power lines. I do take chances sometimes, but I don't usually consider myself to be reckless, and I'm not about to start at this point in my life! So, we asked Larry to come out and help us. Today the house got finished! Larry said that few groups who come out to work on the reservation ever actually get to see what they have worked on completed. I think he, along with the Westons, were very happy to see us complete this work. Now all of the ladders, great and small, can go back out to the Habitat house! Like most other Middlers, I'm in the process of completing the paperwork for my internship for next year. I think I'm late (what else is new!), so I have to get this e-mailed back to Luther Seminary ASAP. I would really like to go to a domestic Horizon site particularly somewhere that is involved in Native American ministry or is intentionally multi-cultural. These two sets of forms are funny, i.e. the regular internship form and the Horizon form. With some of the questions on the one form you grade yourself from 1 to 5 and on the other form, for the same question, you grade yourself in just the opposite way. I think it's a test in consistency! Larry is going out to the Habitat house one more time before we leave. I have enjoyed working on the house, so I have offered to go out with him again. He is trying to finish the siding on one side and those 12-foot lengths of concrete-coated siding can get pretty heavy! There is a group coming after we leave that will finish the siding on the other three sides and start insulating and putting up the drywall inside. He wants to be as well-prepared for them as possible. As we are driving out to Porcupine and the H4H house, I talk with Larry about my internship hopes of going to a Horizon site. There was one particular site in Tacoma, Wash., I wanted to go to, if it got designated, but it doesn't look like that is going to happen. I tell him about this. He turns to me as we are driving and says, "Pine Ridge is a Horizon site." I'm like, "You've got to be kidding!" I had no idea. So, now, as I get this paperwork e-mailed, I am filled with hope that I might be able to come back here for an entire year. I have to say this makes the thought of leaving here next week a little easier to bear. Keep us in your prayers. Your sister, Linda Friday - October 10, 2003 - top Week 5 (10/5 10/11) Part 3 This week has been one of grace and frustration. In the tutoring I have be doing at the high school I have helped kids that are having trouble with math. But once we start working together I see that they are very smart. I am gratified by the comments that have been made like "now I understand math!" But I am frustrated with a system or a lifestyle (or something!)that is preventing these kids from working to the potential I see they have. At least three of the kids that come to study hall are working hard so that they can go into the military. This is one of the few ways they see to get off of the reservation. I would only hope that, if value can be put on education for itself, they would see ways to get certain degrees, like business, teaching, etc., and find ways to come back here and work within the tribal system to make it better for everyone living on the Pine Ridge Reservation. I have found myself getting frustrated with the system of education here that has early release every Wednesday for teacher in-service time and then has extra days off beside. I must say that, when things were going so great – finally- with students in study hall, I resented them having Wednesday afternoon, Thursday, Friday and this coming Monday off! I feel like things are just starting to click with the kids, that they are learning to trust me and are willing to come in and get help, and now it is all coming to an end. It's too soon, God! I don't want to leave yet!! I've told some of the kids that they are welcome to come to the Retreat Center on Thursday for additional help if they would like to, but so many live so far out of town it will be difficult for them to do so, even if they wanted to. One of the things I have learned while I have been here is it is very easy to give your heart to these people. May God's peace by with you, your sister - Linda Sunday - October 12, 2003 - top Week 6 (10/12 10/15) Part 1 Last week, instead of children's church on Wednesday night, there was the 4D (Four Denomination) meeting at Our Lady of the Sioux Catholic church in Oglala. Dinner was served, fellowship continued, and prayers for one another said. The reservation is a very ecumenical place. It has to be. Pastors and congregations are spread out and must depend on one another to do the necessary calling on families or hospital visits or speaking at wakes. Our final week is starting and it really is only part of a week. Today we will worship at Makasan for the last time. Learning to sing hymns in Lakota has been fun. I know we will be few, but we all trust that "where two or three are gathered" God is here with us. Larry was gone to Rapid City to attend some meetings on Friday and Saturday, and will be leaving from church to go to some other meetings in Pierre. That man is constantly on the go. He truly has a heart for God's ministry. Starting to say good-bye is difficult, so in the traditional Indian way, we do not. We just say, "We'll see you later." We have received invitations to come back and stay at various homes. There will be a rummage sale at Makasan that we will miss this weekend, but Comfort helped organize some of the clothes. The puppeteers from Wednesday's children's church will be visiting a church in Colorado that is paying their way. We will miss the excitement of their going and returning. But, we have ordered T-shirts for them so that we can have a small part in their excitement. The H4H house will be completed and the new owner move in and we will not see it. But, we have helped to make this new home possible for someone. All the cookies and cakes that I have baked for the kids coming to the Retreat Center after school have been eaten. Rena and Comfort have played and consoled and worked with the kids every day. I hope we have contributed in some way to making these children feel special, even for just an hour-and-a-half a day. Life will go on here at the reservation. I will miss it! Please do not forget the people here, as I will not forget them! Keep us all in your prayers. Your sister, Linda Monday - October 13, 2003 - top Week 6 (10/12 10/15) Part 2 Just when you think things are winding down, something else happens! A young woman came to the center in the afternoon looking for someone to talk with. She had just left her husband and two children. Larry was still away, Rena and Comfort had just started "kid time," and I was headed downstairs to help as there was no school Monday, so I would not be tutoring. I told her who I was (a seminary student) and said I would be willing to talk with and listen if she wanted. She came in and started to share her story with me. She is a Christian and has been living with pill addictions and spousal abuse. While she shared her story, I could see the love and concern for her kids (2 and 3 years old girls) and her struggle with her marriage and her addictions. I confess I felt a little helpless not knowing all of the resources immediately available on the reservation that could help. She had come to our door thinking we were the women's shelter. I found out later that it is about fifty miles away in the town and district of Kyle. After we talked for a while, I asked her if we could pray, which we did together. After not getting anyone but answering machines several places, she called the hospital and they agreed to have a mental health counselor come in and talk with her if she would come there. We had been talking long enough that it was time for the after school kids' snack and they all came up from the basement. She stayed as I helped with that, and then I followed her up to the hospital in order to offer support as she waited. She was very afraid of people finding out she was addicted to pills. I was so proud of this young woman as she faced people she knew at the hospital and still moved ahead in her decision to seek help. After she went in, I sat reading a book in the little waiting room. A few other people came in and left. Eventually, a couple came in with a young daughter, I'd say she was about four years old. The mom had come for some reason that obviously was not life-threatening as they were all waiting together. There was a lavatory directly off the waiting room. The little girl when in by herself and, suddenly, just started singing up a storm. (She had a very good voice, too!) Well, her parents and I just looked at each other and burst out laughing. Then this little voice from inside the lavatory said, "Don't laugh at me." That just set us off chuckling even more as we heard the toilet flush. Even in the midst of sadness and hardship, there are these little rays of light that shine on all of us! When the young woman I brought came out, she seemed more at peace. Yes, they were sending her home until a place could be found for her, but she had started down a path she had not been able to get to before. She asked if she could call me that night if she needed someone "clean" to talk with. I gave her the phone number at the Retreat Center and we parted with a hug. God, be with this daughter of yours as she struggles with living in a world of addictions and abuse. Be her strength. Be her guide. Be her liberation. Please keep this unnamed young woman, and all other addicted people, in your prayers. Your sister, Linda Tuesday - October 14, 2003 - top Week 6 (10/12 10/15) Part 3
We are off on our final trip around the reservation. We are going up to Kyle, which is about in the middle of the reservation. We are going to visit the main campus of the Oglala-Lakota College, an organization called Lakota Fund, and a Mexican restaurant called Angie's. Rena has packed up all of her things. Her husband, David, will be meeting us in Kyle and taking her off with him. Our little group of three is beginning to dissolve after 5-1/2 weeks together. In order to get to Kyle, we will drive through Porcupine, a place we have spent many hours over the last 5+ weeks. When we stop at the college one of the people we had hoped to speak with is not there. But, we are able to speak with a young Lakota man, Stacy, who from what I have heard is quite a computer whiz. Stacy is very gracious in showing us around. We go into a building that is still being outfitted on the inside. Soon there will be new chemistry labs and a computerized aeronautics lab. I am very impressed at the equipment I see in the chemistry labs. Stacy tells us that grants from the NSF (National Science Foundation) and NASA are helping to build these labs. I am excited for the young people who will be able to come here and take classes. There are satellite facilities of this college in all of the nine districts on the reservation (if I understand this correctly). Many classes are on-line or available on CD/DVD. After Stacy leaves us we go into the bookstore as all good students would! None of us walks out empty-handed. We head off to meet up with David, have lunch at Angie's, and visit Lakota Fund. What a great lunch! Angie had one of my favorite things for lunch that day – tamales! Next we go to Lakota Fund. Here we find out about funding available to small businesses on the reservation. There are rays of hope shining forth all over the place today. But, now it is time to say "see you later" to Rena and David. The end of our time together is here. Comfort and I will be leaving tomorrow, but today – sigh! - signifies the beginning of the end. With hugs all around we part company. They head north and east, we head south and west. We will meet again at a different time and in another place. But, for now, we must head back to Pine Ridge for the last day with the after school kids and my last day of tutoring at the high school. As always, keep us in your prayers. Your sister, Linda Wednesday - October 15, 2003 - top Week 6 (10/15) Part 4 I think this will be my last entry. We are leaving Pine Ridge today. I have had breakfast/devotions/prayer with Gabby and Larry, but Gabby is in a hurry to leave this morning as he has an interview for a potential plumbing job on the reservation. We hug and ask God's blessing to be on one another. I am dallying. I thought we would leave by 8 am, but it is now 9. The car is packed. We are ready to go. There are more hugs all-round. Already, I want to come back! Please, God, make the way. Comfort and I drive off. It is a new adventure. We will see part of the reservation and part of the Black Hills we have not yet seen. The terrain is beautiful. We talk a lot at first. Part of it is still processing our time on the reservation; part of it is still getting to know each other better, even after 5-1/2 weeks together. I had been planning on going to the Elders Spirituality Conference on the White Earth Reservation in Minnesota, but I have come down with a cold. Even before we leave Pine Ridge I have decided not to go this year. It's a good thing, as I sneeze a good deal of the ride home. With the time change, we arrive back at the seminary about 9 pm. Even with our stops, we make the trip in about eleven hours. My cats are joyous to see me! My friends who have been looking after them are relieved of duty and my friends who have been filling my bird feeders are likewise relieved. The best news of the evening for me is an e-mail message I receive from Larry telling me that the young woman I spoken with on Monday, who was seeking help for her addiction and abuse situation, stopped by the Retreat Center earlier in the day. She told him she would be entering the battered women's shelter in early November. I pray that all her needs will be met there to help her through her addictions and the abusive home situation. It is now time that I thank you for reading this diary of mine. I know there are things I have forgotten to tell you. I can think of one or two right now! But, you have made this part of my journey with me. It has not ended yet, and will not, hopefully, for years to come. Thank you and God bless each and every one of you. May God full us with hope, with love, and with a vision of what God is doing on the earth today! Your sister, Linda |
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